Trump Slathers Bruised Hand in Makeup to Swear In New Goon

President Donald Trump’s right hand nearly matched the gilded gold of his Oval Office as he swore in his new Secretary of Homeland Security amid nationwide airport chaos on Tuesday.

As Oklahoma Senator Markwayne Mullin cemented his pivot from the legislative branch to the executive branch to replace the ousted Kristi Noem, the 79-year-old president slathered makeup on his often-bruised right hand to mark the occasion.

The president's right hand nearly matched the gaudy gold accents hanging in his Oval Office. / Chip Somodevilla / Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

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