Top Trump Stooge Has Tantrum After Keystone Kash Busted at Team USA Hockey Bash

President Trump’s top mouthpiece has flipped out over criticism leveled at “Keystone” Kash Patel after the FBI director was busted celebrating with a U.S. Olympic team on the taxpayers’ dime.

Patel, who, on becoming FBI director, said resources would go solely toward fighting crime, was pictured celebrating in Italy with Team USA after its overtime Olympic victory over Team Canada in the men’s hockey final.

The 45-year-old hockey buff mingled with the players while guzzling beers and beating his chest as if he were part of the team. He even commandeered a gold medal at one point, looping it around his neck. The fallout was spectacular, with many wondering why the embattled crime chief was in party mode while his bureau struggles to find the missing mother of Today host Savannah Guthrie.

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